Chapter Twelve

With a heavy heart and much confusion I left Dot in the bedroom and made my way back down stairs, I headed into the den and sat behind the desk, my mind even more confused with the added bomb shell from Dot.

I had to prove to dot I was telling the truth, I could not believe she had held onto the letter for all that time and never mentioned it to me.

Why? had she believed it when the letter arrived?, or did she think of it as crap and that's why she never mentioned it until now?, I pulled the letter out of my pocket, it was dated 29th May 2005, she had the letter six months ago, and why had this Kim person waited over a year to send the letter? jeez my head was hurting trying to come up with the answers.

 

 I checked the time, 6.45am, our flight was at ten, and I still had to get back to the hotel and finish my packing for the next leg of the tour. That was what I had to focus on right now, when I met with my lawyer in Cleveland later I would get his take on this whole situation, for my own sanity I needed the distraction of my job.

 

Picking up the phone I rang for a cab, then hanging up I sat thinking, I didn't want to, but my thoughts wandered to the now two women in question, and the fights I had to deal with, I had to ask, why me?

 

Hearing the cab pulling onto the drive I left the house quietly, as he came to a halt I got in the cab and gave him the instructions of where to go, then I sat back quiet in thought as he drove me back to the hotel, paying the fare with tip  I made my way back into the hotel and back up to my room.

 

Within the safety of my room, I thought the solace would be a comfort but the silence was deafening, I ached for company.

I considered calling Rich but he had fallen into his bed only a couple hours before, the rest of the band would have joined me happily but not without a barrage of question's, I decided for now, the Tv would have to do.

 

Searching out the remote I clicked the set on, while hitting the switch on the coffee pot, then making my way out back to pack ready to leave for the airport.

 

My body was tired and ached from lack of sleep and exhaustion, talking to myself I made a note to sleep on the flight, using my cell I called matt and told him to make sure my sleeping quarters were made up for me when I got on board, he asked no questions and accepted my request and would make sure it was done.

 

Then carrying on I collected the rest of my clothes out of the closet and from the dresser to pack, I laid fresh jeans and t out ready to wear after my shower, when I was interupted by a knock at the door.

 

"Mr Bon Jovi sir?"

Walking back through to the sitting area I opened the door to be met by the hotel manager. He smiled nervously,

"good morning sir, I am sorry to disturb you so early but there is a reporter at the front desk asking for you, he said it was urgent?" 

 

God damn it, the bitch must have done what she said, well the last thing I was going to do was talk to a reporter,

"thanks Er?"

"Andrew lever, I'm the manager of the hotel"
He said his name and position with pride,

"right, yeah erm Andrew, please just tell the reporter I'm not doing any interviews right now."

"thank you sir I will tend to it for you, sorry again to disturb you" I watched as he left and waited for the elevator to return him to the front desk.

 

Closing the door to my room for the first time I looked at the TV, "Breaking news, "Jon Bon Jovi, has a secret love child and affair with two women, this and more coming up after the break."

 

 

Chapter Eleven

"Dot, c'mon, I came to you because I wanted to be honest, not because I am having an affair, I swear on the kids lives I'm innocent"

" Jon, I want to believe you, but see this from where I'm sitting, if the shoe was on the other foot, what would you think?"

" I know what your saying, but I trust you and would give you the benefit of the doubt"

"yes, that word trust, thing is Jon when it's gone, there are no refills, and even when a small amount comes back it's never the same"

" What have I done Dot, tell me, cause through our marriage I have been faithful"

" I'm not getting into the past now"

"the past, your judging me but won't tell me why?"

"Ok, what about Kim?"
"Kim, Kim? Who the fuck is Kim?"

"Oh c'mon don't tell me you don't remember her"

"for the love of god I have no fucking idea"

"you and her on stage"

" on stage?"
"please stop playing dumb Jon"
"But I don't know what your referring to, or who"

Dot got out of bed and went to her mail desk, she rifled around then walked back and handed me a pink envelope with writing and post mark of UK.

"go on open it"

 

Inside was a letter and a photograph of me and a women, both smiling, I had my arm draped around her shoulders and was leaning in to peck her cheek, no different from all the other fans I had met over the years and posed for photographs for. then I read the note accompanying the photograph,

 

"Dear Mrs Bon Jovi,

 

I am deeply sorry having to write to you, but I have tried making contact with Jon through his management and have met with a brick wall.

 

My name is Kim and I met your husband when he played Hyde Park in 2003, I was one of the girls allowed on stage for a couple of songs to watch up close the show, it was during this time that Jon approached me during an interlude and ask me if I wanted to meet him back stage, he said he would arrange for me to stay on the stage until the end of the show, then he would have Clive or Matt escort me to his room.

 

I don't want to make this anymore painful than it is, but I met Jon back stage and a wild night of passion took place and after I found myself pregnant.

 

That was 11 months ago,  His Daughter was born on February 21st 2004, She was consummated when he played in June 2003. She arrived into this world weighing 7lb 6oz,  she has bright blue eye's just like her dad and his smile.

 

I enclose a picture of his daughter Amelia May, for him to see, You may think I am now writing for money but I am not,  I don't want anything from Jon other than recognition for his daughter. I know his infidelity must be painful for you, but what else was I to do?, I did not want to go to the press.

 

I know this is a big ask, but if you could see your way clear to speaking with him and responding with acknowledgement I cannot tell you how grateful I would be.

 

Yours Sincerely

 

Kimberley Mount"

 

I stood digesting the letter and the photograph, but the women I was looking at  I seriously had no recollection of,

"So based on this fruit cake of a letter you assume I am guilty and have an illegitimate  child in the uk with this women?"

"Oh c'mon Jon, that child is the spitting image of you"

There was no denying she did have some of my features, but I honest to god did not know the women.

"Dot, I swear to you, I do not know this women, jeez I pose for pictures all the time with fans, only difference is not all of them claim to have had my child....."

"look Jon, I'm tired, please can you go now.... just let me alone.. I need to think over all this"

"Look if I prove I am innocent with this Kim person?"

"Then yes, I'll talk to you, but that is gonna take a miracle.

 

 

 

Chapter Ten

The room fell silent, me sat on the bed, and Richie stood in front by the dresser, finally Richie spoke, "So what ya gonna do?"

 

"that's just it Rich, I have no fucking idea, this is all unchartered territory for me, man, in all the years Bon Jovi have been together I've have never had a situation like this, and now not having control over my life any more?, it's fucking scary bro, we have a hundred date tour to do.... and right now all I can think about is my family and Dot, what the fuck am I to do? Tell me?" I got up and started to pace like a caged animal.

 

"Jon, calm down, getting worked up like this aint doing you any good,"

I listened to Rich but I felt as if my world was spinning like a hyper speed mini go round and I could not get off or make it stop. Richie placed his hand on my shoulder, 

"C'mon, take it easy eh?"

my mind was so fogged with the crap, I asked Rich again, "So what shall I do?"

"Bud, you know my thoughts, I can't tell you what to do man, that has to be your decision, but my advice would be, just do what's in your heart."

 

I stopped pacing while Rich spoke, I still could not shake the feeling I needed to go home and see Dot, to me that felt the right thing to do.

 

"I wanna do just that Rich, but you know what's killin me, this is a lose; lose situation, the only option I have is how can I limit the damage this fucking bitch is gonna cause."

 

" so call dot, talk on the phone, let her know what's happened, play it down, like it's all in hand."

 

"I can't do that, not on the phone, this is something she needs to hear in person, sides I'm no good at hiding shit, she will know right from the get go something is wrong"

"want me to call her?"

"hell no, looks like I am even more guilty, she would chew you up and spit ya out, sides what's it say when her own husband can't speak to her?, no man, I know you don't agree, but I have to get home and see Dot and talk to her in person. Really that's my only hope."

 

"look, man if that's what you gotta do, then you go do it. I'm here if you need me, Ok?"

"Ok"

"well no time like now, I best go call front desk and order a cab, you staying here?"

"Yeah man, I'm beat, I need some sleep, but you call me if you need, ok?"

"Ok, I will, now get your ass outta my room"

 

He laughed and as he walked out of the door, and headed off down the hallway, he called back, "take care of you, see you at the airport tomorrow "

"Yeah I will" Reaching his room door he opened it and with a final salute he went inside. I moved back into my room, and closing the door went to search out my nap sack.

I found it in the closet under my jeans, moving back to the sitting area I collected the pictures off the coffee table and put them in the bag, then moved to the player and removed the tape and put that in too.
I stood, by the phone with the cradle in my hands and the dialling tone sounding from the receiver, not yet ready to make the call for a cab, I thought about what I was about to do. Fact, if Dot found out through the press me being innocent would hold no grounds, she would argue why had I never told her before, no, it was a shit task but one I had to do, I pressed zero and rang down and spoke to the night receptionist to book me a cab.

Minutes later the phone rang, It was front desk telling me the cab had arrived.

Walking out my door to the elevator I ran through in my head how I was going to tell Dot about the blackmail.  I continue to play out the conversation in my mind the whole way home, it was only as we pulled up to the house, which was in complete darkness it hit home the enormity of what I was doing.

Paying the cab fare I got out and headed round to the back door, hand on ledge I found the key, and let myself in.

Dawn was breaking, and the birds had begun to sing, and I was about to commit marital suicide as I walked through the house and headed up the stairs to our bedroom.

Reaching the door I stood outside, taking a deep breath I opened the door and walked across to the bed and gently sat and watched Dot sleep.

Gently I traced her features with my fingers, as she woke she sat up and blinking her eye's she asked, "Jon?, is that you?"
"Yeah honey it's me?"
she edged back in the bed and sat with her back resting against the bed rest, "what's wrong?" she glanced at the night table and the clock, "it's four am, what is going on?"

Taking a deep breath I began, taking her hand in mine I ran through what had happened back stage only forty eight hours ago.
dot clicked on the night side light, and remained quiet the whole time I was talking. Her expression showing concentration.

When I had finished I brought out the fake photographs and took the tape over to the player and played it.

Dot sat in silence. and did not speak for ages,
"So where is she now?"
"I have no idea, Rich and me handed her to security at the hotel, I guess she has gone back home." it was sinking in that Dot did not believe me,
"Dot, you do believe me?"
"I want to Jon, but you arrive in the early hours of breaking dawn and tell me this tale, I don't honestly know."
"Dot, we have been married for years, of course you know me, I would never do anything to hurt you."
"We'll nothing intentional anyway eh Jon?"
"ouch, where did that come from, have I done something in the past that has now made you doubt me?"
"one or two things, but they are nothing compared to this?"
"What?, Dot did you listen to anything I said?"
"Yeah I've listened to it all, and I don't know what to think or believe"
"So you doubt me?"
"well the evidence is pretty strong"
"they are fake photo's babe, they aint real."
"Well they look real enough to me, and from what I have seen, it looks like you have been having an affair with this women for a long time and now your mistress is gonna deal the dirt on your affair your hear trying to get me to believe your sorry shit about being blackmailed...."
"But Dot it's the truth, ask Rich, for fucks sake, he can vouch for me, and my head of security, even Diane, c'mon babe, please."
"I'll think about it Jon, now please go and leave me."

Chapter Nine

"thanks bro, thought I could at least rely on you for support,"
"hey, you want me to blow smoke up your ass Jon, then I aint your man."
It suddenly dawned on me that the stalker was watching us both, I lent in close to Richie, "think we should get security and have her removed?, she's listening to us"
Rich nodded his head and whispered back, "yeah, use my room, I'll stay with her."
He handed me his key and without another word I left to go call the front desk for security.

I was possibly gone for no more than ten minutes, but walking back into my room, I felt a tension, a tension that wasn't there before, the pictures were on the coffee table still laying where I threw them, Richie was by the mini bar and by the look of the empty shot bottles he had drank three vodka's. This time it was my turn to ask if he was ok.

"Yeah I'm fine, just downed a couple so when I get back to bed I'll sleep" I sensed there was more to it than he said but didn't push, I just nodded and decided to leave alone, I was guessing he had words with our uninvited guest.
" what front desk say?"
just as I was gonna answer him there was a knock at the door, "Mr Bon Jovi, call for security?"

I went and opened the door, the security guard came into the room as Richie dragged the stalker from the sofa and deposited her in, we later learned Mikes arms, as he left he apologised and being head of security he would make sure that this never happened again.
I was not in the mood for apologies, if they had done there job correctly I would not be in this situation, I wanted to voice my anger, but stayed quiet instead, I would address there tardy professionalism with my lawyer.
both Rich and me stood at the hotel door and watched as he left dragging a protesting screaming women down the hallway and on to the elevator.

Closing the door I turned to Richie, "Bro I gotta go home."
"are you for real? at three am in the morning your gonna head home?"
"You heard her?"
"Yeah, I did... and...."
I interrupted, "look, Rich, she said she would go to the press by morning if I did not agree to her demands and I have no doubts that she will do what she say's.
"Who is she gonna talk with at three am?, be logical man."
"Logical, where has that got me?"
"a long way in life Jon, this is a glitch and a crazy bitch, it will blow over you'll see."
"oh right, so from you agreeing with me I'm screwed to now it will blow over?"
"I know, I know right, wrong thing for me to say."
"what I'm fucked or the bullshit your trying to wash on me now? Rich; I can't bare for Dot to hear this through the media, I need to go see her and prepare her for the crap that is gonna come out tomorrow."
"I think your crazy, you should call her out and grow some balls..."
"No, Rich, you have some balls, I need to go see Dot.."
"man, you aint thinking straight right now, listen, how will it look to Dot if you go home protesting your innocent at this time in the morning, and then the shit hits the fan on the news at eight am? you think she will believe you?, add in those photo's and man you are totally screwed, you will look guilty."
I sat down on the bed, baseball cap and glasses in hand, I looked up at Richie, I felt lost, and out of control and had no idea what I should do anymore, my head could not connect with the concept of handling this situation. "So what would you do?"
"me?, I'd ride it out man, and no, it aint an easy decision, but that's what I'd do, let the storm hit and clear up the shit after, then maybe I'd have a chance to prove my innocence."

Chapter Eight

While Richie had gone to call Marc, I stood looking at the person that was bringing complete misery to my life with her lies, the photo's laying on the table.
"don't you want to see our life in pics Jon?"
"it's not our lives, it's your twisted lies only."
she sneered at me as she replied, "um, you know that and I know that, but you have gotta prove it... I've fooled more people already than you will ever know..."
"Like who?, what makes you think you are gonna get away with this?"
"Oh, I already have, that's why I am stood here right now..." she laughed, then walking to the sofa she sat, crossed her legs and took a cigarette from my pack and lit it, then seductively she exhaled.
"You know Jon, if you want this over, and you want your perfect little life back, it's very easy to have?"
I had started to pace, not wanting to be any where near her, I did not want to talk either as I knew she could be recording the conversation, but I could not stop myself asking,
"how?, eh, what's the price tag?"
"Oh, that's easy, you,"
"me?"
"Yeah you, one night, all night sex you and me, and a promise of $50 thousand bucks in my account every month until you retire... and a repeat performance whenever I want it and I'll keep quiet, and you can carry on your life like before..."
"And if I refuse?"
"then our affair will be public knowledge by morning..."
"that's blackmail,"
"Prove it Jon, are you better truth teller, than I am a liar?, or as I like to be known a fantasist..." again she laughed.
the contempt I felt for this person was over whelming I had started to shake with anger, and could hardly hold back any longer, I could not believe the demands she was making, how the fuck had it gotten to this?, from a fan walking into my dresser to now seeing my world as I knew it falling apart, and there was nothing I could do to stop it, well I could, but it was not an option, I began to move forward in her direction not sure if I could hold back the anger that had built and was now ready to erupt, it was Richie walking back into the room, that stopped me doing something stupid.
"Yo, hold up bro, let's deal with this in the right way,"
Feeling Richie's hand on my arm calmed me down, "So what Marc say? " He's coming over in the morning to meet you, we have to give him everything we have, and he is gonna apply for a restraining order"
"a restraining order is that it?"
"Yeah, technically she aint done anything wrong."
"you are kidding me right?"
"Wish I was bro, but I'm not."
"She fucking blackmailed me while you were in the other room."
"She did? What did she say?"
"Oh if I want this to stop, I have to fuck her and give her fifty thousand bucks in her own private account every month until I retire and be her man whore whenever she wants or she is going to make our so called affair public by morning..."

My mind was in total chaos, I could not bear to think about the hurt this was going to cause Dot and the kids , but, i would not give in to blackmail, I looked at Richie, "seems im screwed bro, cause i aint giving in to her blackmail. "
he looked right back at me, "Be strong and pray that Marc can stop this shit.... otherwise, I gotta say bro, I think your fight you are screwed."

Chapter Seven

Had I heard right?, was she really outside my door, I reached for my cell in my pocket and dialled Richie's number, he must have been in bed cause it sounded as though I had woke him when he answered, "yo,"
"Richie bro, I need you, she is outside my door?"
"What?"
"I was on the phone to Dot had just hung up when there was a knock on my hotel door, I called out as I got near and she said its sweet cakes open up"
The stranger, or should I call her the stalker began pounding on the door. "C'mon let me in"
Richie heard it, "ok bro stay calm, hang up I'll be with you in two minutes..."
I did as instructed, then rang the front desk of the hotel and asked for them to send security to remove the stalker, I was assured someone was on the way, still she continued to bang on the door, each time it was harder and louder, "Jon, don't be shy, if your undressed, well it aint like I haven't seen it all before, c'mon open up...."
I sat on the arm of the sofa, my arms wrapped around my chest tightly, then I heard a male voice from the other side of the door, it was Richie. "ok miss, it's time you left, what your doing is called harassment and stalking and that is a crime"
"How is calling to see your lover a crime."
"Jon is not your lover, only in your dreams... now c'mon"
I heard Richie trying to move her down the hallway to the elevator, "Take your hands off me"
"I'm telling you I'm his mistress, I have been for three years, look, hold up and I'll prove it..."
"Save it hunni, whatever fantasy world your living in go back there cause  what your dreaming off will never happen in the real world."
"Look stop, already let me show you the proof..."
"twisted truth maybe, no, your leaving and if you come back I will get the cops" I had opened the door and watched what was happening, Richie was stood with his hand wrapped on her arm tightly waiting on the elevator to arrive, when it did as luck would have it the security guard was on there, Richie handed her to security with strict instructions not to let her into the hotel or anywhere near me or Richie. The security guard nodded his head and looked sheepish, I am sorry Mr Sambora, she gave proof that she knew you guy's she had passwords and photo's as proof."
"Proof what proof"
"Pictures of you all together, intimate photo's, we had no reason to disbelieve what we were being shown and what was being said."
The stalker, stood arrogant, then putting her hand into her purse she pulled out photographs that she had shown to the hotel staff to get past security and up to my floor and my room.
Richie looked at the pictures and a very grim serious look spread across his face. he dismissed the security guard and walked back with the stalker to my room. as he approached I opened the door.
"Why you stop her leaving with security bro?"
"Jon, this is a serious man, you need to see the photo's she has, I swear even a pro would have a hard time being able to tell there fake"
Richie pushed past into my room, with her in tow. Roughly he demanded "Show him?"
she smiled and tried to brazen it out, "you show him" Richie snapped, "Just show him the god damn fucking pictures before I slap you silly..."
this time she did as she was told and forty plus pictures of me with this person were staring back at me, all with dates on too. "What the fuck!" if I didn't know me, I would have believed them to be real too.
I looked at Richie, "I'm calling Marc now," he left me standing with the stalker, she looked at me, a smile on her face, she knew she had me and was enjoying every second.

Chapter six

CHAPTER SIX

 

 

I sat next to Richie on the sofa, and put my head in my hands, usually I was the one in control and organised, shit if this was happening to anyone but me I would have it all sorted, but cause it was me, I could not see anything clearly, this time I was blind sided, and I did not like it, no sir I did not like that one bit.

"look man, it's not that I don't believe ya, cause you know I do right?, but shit; all's I'm saying is, if Dot get's to see this shit you are screwed."

"Why would Dot get to see this?"

"I dunno man, this girl, she's determined that's for sure, we gotta cover the bases man."

"Cover the bases?, cover the bases for what?  Richie, I AINT DONE NOTHING WRONG HERE! " I screamed the last sentence out of desperation.

"Look, you asked me less than twenty four hours ago to cover your back, I'm trying to do what you ask, fuck man, I aint got no degree in dealing with psychotic fans; anymore than you do, but from my chair, what I see is someone who is very careful, and has a apt for manipulation, and can play things  well to her own advantage, man she has screwed with that tape to make it look like you had sex in your dresser..."

nodding my head I agreed with Richie, and having a fight with the only person in the band that knew me and who I trusted one hundred per cent was a bad decision.

"I'm sorry bro, I'm just so out of the fucking water here, I've never faced anything like this before, and well, I'm seriously pissed, but scared to fucking shit too."

this time Richie nodded at me, " and yeah  for the record, I'd be shitting myself if it was happening to me too, but hold it together ok, I'll ring Marc in the morning and get the legal stats on this, I'm sure we can have her silenced or something, try not to stress Jon,  one way or another we will figure it out, ok?"

I was thankful for Richie's support, but less than convinced that we could sort it, but I had to make myself believe; cause that was all I had to hold on to right now.

They say hind sight is a good thing, yeah if only I could turn back the clock, how could I have avoided this mess?, the answer was simple and was what I had done after kicking her out, locked my dresser door.

It was no good looking back though the damage was done and out in the playing field and this boy was in play and someway, and I had no idea how, I was gonna find a way out of this mess. 

 

Richie got up, " so, you gonna be ok man?" my mind was racing, there were things I wanted to talk about but, it could wait, there was always tomorrow, so I lied,
"Sure...." as he walked to the door I thanked him too
"thanks man"

he smiled and saluted in typical Richie manner and left my room.  

 

Sitting alone on my own in the hotel, it was crazy me being here, I could easily have gone home, as I lived only a few kilometres away,  but if I did, Dot knowing me as well as she did, she would immediately see that something was pissing me off and eating me, I'd try to deny it, she would push, then we would argue and right now that was the last thing I needed what I longed for was for me to hold her in my arms, and to feel her arms around me, I needed to see my kids too, but until this shit was put to bed I had to be alone.
I settled with the idea on a phone call, moving my way from the sitting area I headed to the bedroom and picked up the phone and dialled home.

The phone rang for ages before it connected, "Hello"
"Dot??"
"Jon?

"Yeah, 

"you ok?"

"I'm fine hon, just needed to hear your voice" 

I could hear muffled sounds as Dot was moving in bed. 

"what time is it?"

"late"

"You in bed?" 

"no, will be in a while, your in bed though, "
"Yeah"
"Sorry I wake you?,"
"no, it's ok, I was napping that's all, so how's it going on the road,?, you doing good?"
"it's ok, same old same old, you know, tell ya something, I  miss you,"
"Well come home then, no one makes you do this, and your minutes away from me..."
I couldn't lie, and I could feel a lump forming in my throat so tried making light of it all, "Oh, yeah and if I gave it all up, who would keep you in the luxury you have got used too eh?, tell me that, and the kids..."
"What's up Jon, something bothering you?"
"nothing, just wanted to hear your voice, you know I miss you guy's more for the first few weeks, just being melancholy I guess"
"Ok, if you say so, well I'm sleepy baby so I'm gonna end the call ok, love you, sleep tight..." reluctantly I said good night too, then the line went dead, dot had ended the call leaving me sitting with the receiver in my hand. I sat holding the handset for ages, until there was a knock on the door, getting up I went to answer and find out who was there, reaching the door I called out "yo" what came back made my blood run cold, " Hey Jon, open up its your sweet cakes" 
 



Chapter Five

CHAPTER FIVE

 

 

 

I stood staring at the package unsure what to do, in my heart I knew what was inside would be anything but nice, and I was fearing the worst. I decided to wait before opening it.

Back upstairs I joined Richie in the VIP area of the bar, he was with the rest of the guy's and Obie, and a few invited guests.

 

Walking over I tapped Richie on the shoulder,  "Yo bro, you cool now?"  I nodded, "Drink?" "Yeah whisky, thanks"

Richie walked over to the bar tender and ordered my drink, I followed him, he turned to look at me, "What's eating you bro, you look like shit, you coming down with something?" I shook my head, "no, but Clive came to my dresser and gave me this." Rich looked down at the package I was holding, "What is it?"

"I don't know, I am nervous about opening it."

"What Clive say?"

"Just that a fan gave it too him and that he was to tell me I'd like it."

"Spooky man, you think it's from her?"

"I guess, I don't know, am I over reacting?"

"maybe, tough call, you want me to do it?"

"Maybe, lets join the guy's first, we can talk about it later, handing the package to the bar tender I asked him to stow it behind the bar until we left, then we went back to join the guy's and Obie.

 

Talk flowed around how the gig was good and it was one of our favourite venues as with only twenty thousand it felt more personal than some of the bigger places we showcase for, I was not really into the conversation and just agreed in the right places, when it was time for us to leave and the guy's left for their hotels I can't deny I was relieved. Rich stuck by me and we collected the package before climbing into the car and being driven back to our hotel.

 

Rich took the package from me and felt around the bumps trying to decide what it was, I think he had guessed same as me but didn't voice it out loud. As we pulled up outside the hotel entrance we were greeted by the doorman, polite as always I made a quick exit and headed straight for the elevator and headed up to my room. Ping the door closed, and the elevator started to move, it managed to get to my floor without stopping which I was relieved about, I really was not in the mood for autograph hunters tonight, honestly apart from Richie I wanted to see no one.

Arriving at my door, I slid the card into the slot and open the door as the light turned green. Inside I laid the package on the coffee table, and headed straight to the mini bar, opening the bar I took out two bottles of whiskey and opened one and drank straight from the bottle, I had just opened the second bottle when there was a knock at the door. I asked who was there, "Who else man, its me Richie."
I opened the door and let him in, "Drink?"
"Yeah, same as you, so you opened it yet?"
"I shook my head and pointed to the package still laying on the coffee table. "Ya gonna though right?"
"again I nodded, I grabbed the last bottle of whisky and took it to Richie with a glass and ice, I handed it to him. we both moved around to the sofa and sat, total silence, and stared at the package. Rich spoke first, "So, you gonna do it or shall I?"
I looked at him, then downed the rest of my whisky before taking the package and starting to open it. We both looked at each other as the package wrapping tore. with it open enough I put my hand inside and pulled at the contents. the package contained just what I thought, a video cassette and letter. Richie took the cassette from my hands and over to the TV and VCR, he hit power and they both came to life, he slid in the tape and returned and sat next to me, making light he said, "Maybe its a blue movie for ya bud?" I managed a weak smile but in my heart I knew it was anything but.....
Rich hit play on the remote and we waited as the fuzz on screen cleared to show the women that had been in my dressing room only last night.

"Hi Jon, remember me?, course you do, I'm your sweet cakes right?, I've never been called sweet cakes before, but I certainly enjoyed it, and I've never been man handled quite like that before either, but you have a touch that's for sure, and well, I'd love for you to do that to me again, so here's my number honey, 517-2879-1800, can't wait for your call, bye for now kiss kiss..."
I sat looking at the screen, and the hissing fuzz that followed after the message, Richie hit stop, then we picked up the note and read, "Hey Jon, hope you like the video, I just wanted to thank you for a great night, definitely one I'll never forget, and if you wait for two minutes after my message there is something else on the tape just for you... see you soon honey bunny kiss kiss"
I looked at rich, and he pressed play on the VCR again, the fuzzy lines came into focus, and I was hoping that she was bluffing, but I was wrong, there was me standing naked when she had ripped the towel from my body, but what I actually said and what was edited to show what I was saying was something else, she had a video in her handbag and she had used it to her advantage. I sat stunned into silence.
"Jeez man, this is one sick bitch, you need to contact the cops bro, this is getting ugly..."
"how can I go to the cops Rich, she aint done anything, she has tampered with a video footage of me, and sent me two messages, what can I say?"
"I dunno bro but you need to stop this, and stop it now, what if Dotty hears about this, man it looks bad, you are naked on the video man."
"I know I'm fucking naked, she burst in on me while I was in the shower, as I walked past she ripped the towel from my waist..."
"well, that aint the way it looks Jon, fuck man she makes it look as though it was planned."
"Yeah, I can fucking see that, oh fuck what am I gonna do Richie, even your looking at me in disbelief, what fucking hope have I of proving I'm innocent?"
Richie looked at me, and tried to reassure me that he believed me, but his face said he didn't, what hope did I have?, none, and right now I had no idea what I could do, I was innocent, but well and truly fucked.



Chapter Four

CHAPTER FOUR

 

 

 

I looked at Richie, what he said resonated with me, I have never seen what the women see, I'm just me, and I've joked on more than one occasion if they saw me first thing in the morning they would get one hell of a shock, trust me when I say I really aint good looking, my wife will vouch for that, but as Richie pointed out it aint about what I see, its about what you guys see. I guess I should be flattered, and I am, but with that I find it embarrassing, I am an entertainer and singer, hell that's my job, and I do it well, but I have never understood the full rock and roll part of my industry, and too a degree I spose I never will. I just lamely nodded my head at Richie and excepted defeat, collecting my cigarettes from the counter top and my cell I went to the bar with Richie; and after a long talk together it was decided,  I should just put the whole thing behind me.  Man  if only I could.

 

After another sold out night , our second at MSG, I saw her again front and centre, I saw her chatting to Clive, head of security for stage, it was hard to make out the conversation as we were taking our final stage call, but from what I saw it was obvious she knew him.

 

Richie saw them too, and looked across at me and nodded his head in there direction, once away from the screaming crowd under the stage, he spoke to me,

"Man, you clock that girl with Clive?, she is hot man.... "

"I saw her Rich, she's the one that broke into my dresser the other night?"

"Fuck man are you serious?"

"Yeah"

"and you refused? are you fucking out of your mind?"

 

I know Rich was just being Rich, and it did not happen often but Richie lit a fuse and I blew,

"fuck Rich, can you forget about your cock for one second here, this aint about getting a fuck from the groupies, its about having my privacy violated. I hoped to god you could understand that, but I was obviously fucking wrong, how stupid of me"

In anger I stormed off, so fast that Richie had to run to catch me up, 

"Whoa there, Jon, hold up...."

I blanked him until I reached my dresser door, then I turned to look at him, I was pissed for the millionth time in two days, "What?"

"What has gotten you bro, you used to joke about girls with me all the time? did something else happen that your not telling?"

I shook my head, "so what is it?, why are you so spooked, this really aint like you?"

relaxing and letting my temper die down I answered Rich honestly, "I don't know why, but she has me feeling nervous, seeing her in  the front row and talking to Clive,  I gotta ask why eh?, its gave me a real bad feeling in the pit of my stomach, its like a feeling that something is gonna happen, like its out of my control."

"Cause Clive spoke with her?, he talks to lot of girls?"

"Yeah, I know he does, but I dunno, I just can't shake this feeling. Just promise me Rich, you will watch my back?"

"Always bro, always, you know that, so you ok?, you want me to come in with ya for a while?" I was real spooked but I wanted to be alone so declined, 

"Nah, I'm good, but thanks."

"O.k, I'm just down the hall though if you need me.."

I watched Rich walk away, as he turned the corner, I opened my door and went into my dresser, careful to lock the door after me. 

 

Walking over to the counter and the mirror I sat, exhaling deeply, I stared at my reflection.  

The stage makeup that was perfectly placed before the show, now all streaked from the copious amounts of sweat that had poured down my face during the two and half hours I had performed with the guys. Taking a cotton wipe, I added cleanser and wiped away the remains of the make-up, then removed the soaked through t-shirt and through it on the wooden chair ready for cleaning, taking my towel I dried my hair and wiped the remaining sweat from my body before putting on the fresh T, that had been left by Di. Normally I would shower first, but tonight I decided I would shower back in the safety of my room at the hotel. Grabbing my things, I walked to the door ready to leave just as there was a knock,  I answered the door, there stood on the other side was Clive,

"Mr Bon Jovi sir, I have been asked to give this to you."

I looked down at what was being passed to me, a package with my name "Jon" written in black marker pen on the front, nothing else.

"Who gave this too you Clive?"

"A fan sir, said you would love what's inside" as I held the package which looked innocent, I had a fear that it was anything but,  I dismissed Clive "thanks'  you can go."

I stood at the door and watched as he walked away, leaving me with the package.

 

 

Chapter Three

CHAPTER 3


I hated the situation I was in, with my back pressed up to the wall, and my personal space invaded I had a losing sense of feeling out of control, I could feel my body became tense with anger, and being  in a compromised discontented position; added together with being seriously pissed it was now only  minutes away before I snapped.
I asked her again, to move and leave, and again she ignored my request,  then without warning my temper errupted, I could take no more, now I was taking control. removing my hands from my man hood I roughly pushed her away from me.
"Just get the fuck out, now!; before I do something I will seriously regret." my temper rising and my voice getting louder as the adrenaline coursed through my veins, I'd had enough of her shit and wasn't going to play her silly games anymore.
"You really want me to leave Jon?" still she tried with her tryst, she was still holding my towel, and raised it to her nose and smelled and licked the towel and made suggestive faces in a lame attempt to get my interest. she failed, I answered
" Just get your stuff and fucking leave, I don't know you, Antonia is it? and what's more I don't wanna know you, or your stupid fucking guessing games, its over, say goodbye sweet cakes your leaving...."  I was still naked, but I  grabbed her firmly by the shoulders and marched her to the door, I opened it and threw her out, then closing the door I locked it.
Walking back into my dressing area, I was talking to myself "muther fucker "  I grabbed my clean clothes and dressed,  then  searched around for my cigarettes, found them and lit one.
Inhaling deep, I paced uneasy with what had happened, sure fans tried sneaking back all the time, and until this incident I had never had cause for concern. I had to know who had allowed her to get past and into my private area.
I hunted around for my cell, finding it under papers on the dresser, I punched in a number and pressed call...
"Richie, you still at the gig man?"
"Yeah, why, I'm in the bar?, you sound pissed, what's up?"
"Can you meet me downstairs' in my dresser?, and Rich, bring me a whisky will ya?"
I hung up the phone, but still I paced, there was a knock at the door,
"Mr Jovi?, it's Diane can I come in please sir, I have left my purse and bag at the side of the chair?"
I unlocked the door and opened it and allowed Diane to enter.
She saw my expression as she came in, having worked for me for so long she knew me well enough to know how pissed I was.
"You ok sir?,"
"not really no."
"Sorry sir, is there something I can do for you?"
"Yeah, maybe you can Diane."
She stood looking at me, waiting for my instructions. I knew it was a real long shot but I had to ask her anyway.
"did you let anyone back stage after the show Di?"
she held  my gaze with a puzzled look on her face, not sure why I was asking her questions, or where I was leading to, but she answered calmly and honestly, and without hesitation.
"No, I didn't, I readied your change clothes while you guys were doing the second encore and headed up to the bar sir."
"has something happened?"
her face was full of concern, "yeah, something happened" I had to decide whether to tell her or not, I decided not. "  but it's ok, thanks Di " she smiled  at me and knew not to push and to leave it alone, so collected her things and left my room.
A few minutes later there was another knock, "who's there?"
"Rich, man, what's going on?"
I opened the door and let him in.  I took the glass of whisky he had in his hand and downed it one, it was strong and I coughed as the warm liquor ran down my throat, giving a warm burning feeling, with my hands now resting on the counter top an my head hung down; Richie spoke, "Shit man, what's with the call you know we always head to the bar after a gig," he paused waiting for me to answer then carried on, " so why are you pissed, we hit a wrong chord or something tonight?,"
"no, nothing like that, but I have had a less than relaxing end to the gig..."
I explained it all to Richie, who listened while perched on my dresser. "So, who let her in then?"
"No idea, that's the thing, I thought we employed a tight ship here."
"you spoke to the guys yet?"
"eh huh, fuck bro, what the fuck...."
"You?, now your giving it that your shocked?, yeah right, come off  it Jon, fuck in our younger days you would have eaten a girl like that alive, only shock your suffering from is that you said no..."
" Nah, really man, it shook me, I'm taking a shower and.... "
"Yeah and you step out to find a beautiful girl in your dresser, sorry bro, I just don't get it..."
Rich tried making light of it, he smiled at me, I smiled back, some of what he said made sense, sure in my younger day's I'd have been cocky and arrogant and played the part, but now I was older, happily married with four kids, I wasn't even tempted anymore, I loved my wife and one night stands were a thing of my past. now more so, compared to this girl that busted in I was an old man.
" jeez Rich, this girl could only have been twenty four, What the fuck do they see in an old man like me."
Rich looked at me and answered, "Sex bro, simple as that and a price tag too. and by the way, you looked in the mirror lately?"

 

 

 

 



Chapter two

CHAPTER TWO


I just stood looking at this women, totally speechless, totally vulnerable and still struggling to understand how in the hell she had gotten past security; And I was uncomfortable with the fact, apart from a towel around my waist I was totally naked underneath, and not knowing this person I had no idea what her next move would be. I just stood in shock looking at her.

She had a fixed smile on her face, and a programme from the show held curled in her hand. The atmosphere was extremely tense as I remained silent. She spoke first,

"Oh,  Jon, I'm sorry I didn't know you were in the shower, I would sit in the other room, but I'm enjoying the view..." she laughed.

"Are you going to say something?"

Finding my voice at last I asked, "how the hell did you get past my security to get in here, this is private?"

"Oh, small favours here and there can get you anything, if you know what I mean..." she licked her lips suggestively indicating how she had reached my private quarters.
"It seems you are a man of habit Mr Jovi, I have it on good authority that you do the same thing after every show, I've followed you and the band around on this leg of the tour, compiling the information I need to meet you, sure I could have paid over $1,600 bucks to have met you for a millisecond in a meet and greet, but that's not for me, I wanted a one to one meet with you, so here I am..."

I listened to what she said, and suddenly felt really cold and there was something sinister in the way she spoke, her appearance was normal if there is such a thing, and I cannot deny that she was attractive, but I was beyond uncomfortable.  I did what came naturally, with the rising anger in my voice I asked her to leave,

"Right, well you have met me now, so I want you to leave..." I walked nearer to the door leading back inside my dressing room, as I past her she grabbed my towel and held it as I stopped horrified and stood totally naked before this stranger.

She threw back her head laughing, "now that's what I came to see..." I was stood in close proximity to her, I made to run through the door but she moved and blocked my exit. I slid my hands down and held them in place covering my man hood from her gaze.

"Oh come on Jon, you perform on stage every night shaking your booty, and teasing us all into a frenzy, are you telling me, you don't have the balls to see it through?"

" Let be clear , your'e here cause you expect me to fuck you?, just like that?, women are you crazy, have you totally lost your mind?"
"Maybe, but you can't say your not attracted to me,"
"What?, I don't fucking know you?, but for the record I'm happily married, and fyi, I never get involved with my fans, any of them EVER!  so, take your fucking deluded visions with you and get the fuck out of here."
 She totally ignored everything I said, and moved in even closer invading my personal space, she was inches away from being able to touch me, my hands held firm and covered my man hood. then as she took a step back she started to writhe her body up and down as if she was sliding up and down a pole in a suggestive manner, all the time trying to hold eye contact with me. I could not believe the audacity of this women, but had to hand it too her that she had some balls to break in to my private quaters, my mind began to wander, where was Richie, or Diane, they always called by before leaving a show, but not tonight, I found that strange, I racked my brains wondering if Diane was the loose cannon that had allowed this women to get in to my quarters, but she had worked for me for over fifteen years and had never done anything even minor in that time, could Richie have let her in?, sure he loved the fans, but I hoped not and I felt real guilty for suspecting him, but I was pissed and clutching at straws trying to make sense of this out of control situation I was in.
She had stopped dancing seeing my lack of interest, but still showed no signs of volunteering to leave,
 "Oh Jon, stop over thinking it, your still trying to figure how I got in here right?"
she paced with an arrogant manner still in my space, I went to stand back further, but my  back hit the cold of the wall behind me. I was trapped.

 



Chapter one

CHAPTER ONE


The venue, Madison square gardens, 2005, a sold out show to 20,000 screaming fans...... who are we? We are Bon Jovi.... and me, I am the leader and boss of the band. if you still don't know, I'm Jon Bon Jovi.
 I did not set out to be the main man, but given it was my family name, the responsibility somehow fell to me and my band mates settled comfortably into me holding that role.
We had all been together for so long now, it was like being involved in a sexless marriage. each knowing when to stay quiet and when to hand out support, that is what we worked hard to achieve, a relaxed equilibrium for us all, and as long as they did as I said it was all good... no, I'm joking , well in part, I give them a democracy to express their voices, and somehow between us it just comes round to being my idea's that we all run with, no, I don't know why, but that is the way of it.
Many people that know me will tell you I am a very private man, I do not like washing my dirty laundry in public and try very hard to protect my band and my family when ever possible.
I may be the leader of a rock and roll band, but I have never lived the glitz and glamour lifestyle, it was just never me, but the press just have a way of finding crap and enjoying inflicting hurt on people, like it is their right to sit in judgement and twist interviews to suit their reading audience.
They care not if it is true, as long as they hit their market target they are happy.
Well this year, I was not able to stop the press train and it caused serious damage, to me and my wife and my family.
I was painted as being an adulterer, accused of having had sex with a fan. it was not true, but the fan that got carried away on  the fantasy and  made the allegations, well, she received more than her fifteen minutes of fame; and this time I could not just stay quiet, as this was a sign apparently of guilt.
Obie, my long time friend tried to limit the damage and give the truth but, even the truth was twisted, it seemed I had been the good guy of rock for so long, everyone wanted me to be the bad guy, they wanted me to fall from grace so they could all say I told you so, and every news story that aired the dirtier the lies became.
I instructed a lawyer to deal with the liable but still it continued. nothing could stop it, the damage was huge, and which after six continuous months of non stop accusations, my wife, could take no more. Dot was a strong women but each lie she heard I saw the light in her eye's fade more and more,  result, fed up and sick of living with the lies and hell finally she left me taking my four precious children with her, nothing I said would convince her I had not committed what I was accused of.  I was helpless and could do nothing to stop my world falling apart.
Like everyone else, the lies became the truth to her and she was swept away with the moment and did the only thing she felt she could do, she took off and headed west to see her family, her own words,
"I need time for this to die down Jon, for me to be on my own and to talk with family and sort out the chaos in my mind that right now is killing the love I have for you, please, just let me go..."
That night I watched as my beautiful wife, got into the family SUV with our  four children and drove out of my life, killing my heart with pain as she faded into the distance.
Ok,  so I guess you  now know, this is gonna be real painful for me, but you need to know the truth; So, let me take you back to the night in question, and relive the events, that was twisted into lies that changed my world forever.
We begin at the end of the show we had done, and the fourth encore on the first night at MSG.
The adrenaline pumping through my veins and with the screams and whistle pounding in my ears, together with the sweat dripping from my body, I high fived Richie and beckoned for the other guys to join me at front of stage for us to make our final stage call of the show.
For three hours we had performed old songs and new songs and given everything we had to give, with nothing left in us but exhilaration and exhaustion, with a final wave to the screaming crowd we left the stage.
No one spoke as we exited under the stage platform and headed out into the corridor, all taking towels from our dresser's on route back to our dressing rooms.
I reached my door first and reaching for the door lever I spoke to Richie, " Another great night for the Guy's eh Rich?"
Richie turned round, and with his towel in his hand he wiped his brow of sweat that was trickling down from under his Stetson, with a raspy voice he replied,
"It was fucking A man, fucking A, we may be getting old, but fuck we have still got it...."
I held on to my towel resting round my neck,  "  fucker, you're getting old, not me... I'm just older"
Laughing Richie, carried on his way but gave me the finger before disappearing around the corner to his dressing room.
Inside my dressing room, Diane had left my fresh clothes pressed and ready for me to change into after my shower,  together with cards and gifts that had been delivered to the stage door, and thrown on stage during the show, I picked up a few of the cards and looked through them, before dropping them loosely back on the counter top with my towel before walking out back to the shower.
Out back, and stripping off my wet stage clothes that were stuck to my body, now naked I grabbed my douche bag and fresh towel and stepped into the shower.
My mind was thinking over the show, what could we improve on, when I heard a voice,
"Hello?, are you in here....... Hello....."
My heart was racing and the voice was getting nearer, I hurried to rinse off the body wash and shampoo and turning of the shower I managed to grab my towel and fix it round my waist just as the door to the wet area opened and I stepped out of the shower to be met by someone I did not know.
The female smiled at me, "hi, sorry to barge in, but my names Toni,... Antonia, I just wanted to call back here and say thanks for a great show."
I was nervous to the pit of my stomach, and irked that security had failed and she had somehow managed to slip past them and into my personal domain. for the first time I felt compromised and stunned into not knowing what to do.